My light fails...& i grow weary in this darkness.

I'm back from the dead

Tue, 08 May 2007 04:53:03 GMT

I'm sorry about the lackage of posts but they banned the site at my work!!! Injustice! but heaps of people complained now it's back. i missed my lil chats with the open air waves. Anyway catch up

~studying to be a nurse
~Am just about to Finish working at Green Corps (bush regeneration work)
~Nick bashed me i sent him sailing (well to jail) now i'm single and hoping nick dies painfully
ummmmm not much else really love you all xoxoxox

Heya from the valley

Mon, 24 Apr 2006 00:09:05 GMT

I think my brain is officially broken. I'm very confused at presant but i'll start at the beginning. OK today is monday last saturday (3 days ago) i came to stay at a very close friends house in a little town (the valley) half an hour away from my town. Now in recent weeks i've been very sick in the stomach (i was told it was stress) so when i got the invite to come i thought it would be a good holiday for me which it has most definatly been but today me n my friend are going into my town for the day n i feel sick now. i don't know whats stressing me but i hate feeling like this rrrrrrrrrrrr but i am staying one more night so i can suss it out. i'm gonna miss my friend n her beautiful little dog molly. anywhoo must das catch you round

i love jason voorhees!!!

Thu, 23 Feb 2006 07:08:02 GMT

ummm yeah i bought the box set friday the 13th starring yeah you guessed it the big guy himself the one who started it all chi chi chi ha ha ha JASON! it cost a bit but totally worth it. anyway on a different note i'm writing a horror novel. i've written heaps but what i'm posting is just the first murdur of deragned twins "the viles" mmmuuuhahahahahaha bear in mind this is a first draft and the names still need tweaking as does the writing. i need creative criticsum but be gentle :) love you sorry forgot how to LJ cut
PS it is a bit gorey

Emily’s hand on his shoulder brought him back. He kicked open the door and threw Jane across the floor before slamming the door shut. Breathing heavily he looked at Emily who was staring at him her head tilted slightly.
“Everything ok?”
“Of coarse dear sister. The night is young and we have much work to do.” He bowed and gestured to the closed attic door.
“Ladies first”
Emily stepped past Jake and opened the door. Spotting Jane in the corner she walked quickly into the room and over to her. She kneeled down and inspected their latest catch.
“What are you going to do to me?” she whispered
Emily looked at Jake and smiled
“Oh” he said “just some wholesome family fun”
They both laughed before grabbing Jane and dragging her to a steel table in the corner of the room. She fought but it was no use they laid her out on the table and began to strap her down. Emily passed Jake a roll of duct tape.
“You know their screaming always gives me a headache”
He quickly tapped up her mouth before picking up a scalpel.
“What piece shall we keep this time?”
“My dear brother I believe I chose last time so……it is your choice”
“I think some eyes this time. What do you think sister? Their quiet pretty”
“Yes a wise choice we need them for our new sister. I’ll hold her so she doesn’t move about”
Emily put her hands at each of Jane’s ears and wrapped her long fingers around her face holding open her eyes. He began slowly cutting around her right eye blood oozed down the side of Jane’s face covering Emily’s hand. Jane screamed but it was almost completely muffled. She fought against her restraints but with no avail. In only a few minutes Jake had the new pieces to complete their newest family member. Emily released her grip and Jane threw her head about in agony splattering blood on the floor.
Emily pulled a fistful of wadding from a draw under the table and stuffed it into Jane’s empty eye sockets.
“That’ll stop you messing up my floor” she said with a smile
Jake pulled out a bone saw
“Let’s cut off her foot and leave it for her boyfriend”
“Ok but I’m not cleaning up that mess”
“Deal”
Jane shook her head and pleaded. Emily looked down at her.
“Sorry I didn’t quite catch that” she laughed “shall I go find a box for her foot?”
“Good thinking.”
Emily walked out of the room as Jake began to cut into Jane’s ankle. She pulled against her restraints and threw her head about.
“Sister” he called “May I take off her gag? I do love the sound they make”
“Alright just this once”
He ripped off the duct tape and began sawing again. Jane screamed and pleaded but it only seemed to encourage him to saw faster. Within moments her foot thudded to the floor. Jane sobbed soundlessly as Emily entered the room holding a small box.
“I found one perfect size”
“Lovely but we’ll let it dry first”
He wrapped the foot in a sheet and set it down on the floor in the corner. Emily pulled out a roll of suture wire and a surgical needle and began sewing Jane’s lips together. She wriggled around trying fruitlessly to free herself from her restraints. Jake quickly held her head still and Emily continued until she had completely sewn her mouth shut.
“Good work sister. Now I’ve a surprise for you and mother. You go get her and I’ll set it up” he said excitedly
“Oh sounds fun” she darted downstairs and Jake began to prepare his surprise. He went to a chest of drawers against a far wall. He pulled out two large meat hooks and a long rope. He dragged a step ladder underneath one of the beams. He tied a noose in the rope and tossed it over the beam. He went over to Jane who was still sobbing he undid her straps and rolled over. He picked up the meat hooks and slid them into her back near her shoulders. She flinched.
“Shhhhh”
The inside of the meat hooks were sharpened into blades so he was careful not to cut into her skin to much so as not to spoil the surprise. Once both hooks were embedded into her back he picks Jane up and dragged her to the step ladder. Emily came in pushing her mother in her wheelchair. She pushed her over next to two old armchairs and sat down in one of them. He smiled the picked up Jane and slid the noose around her neck then lopped the ring of the meat hooks over two nails in the beams then let her go. He quickly moved the step ladder and took his place next his sister. Jane hung from her hooks struggling blindly to free herself it took less then a minute for the hooks to cut completely through her skin. As she dropped the noose went taught and snapped her neck.

boredom made me

Thu, 23 Feb 2006 06:57:16 GMT

The Steps:
1) Go to your own user info.
2) Click on one of your friends.
3) Go to that friends' user info
4) Click on one of their friends, but NOT someone you have mutually in common or otherwise already know.
5) Scope this person's journal for a while and post an interesting quote you find in it in your journal along with the path you took. Attribute ownership to the quote as you deem nessicary.
6) Pass the instructions along, tag people if this gets slow.

i chose jamesbloodfang which lead me to wee_moony she says:

On a completly different note.
The younger students at school think I'm doing my form teacher!!!

i thought that was cool LOL

MY BABY

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 07:40:04 GMT

So my life is weirdly surreal everything is so perfect i'm waiting to wake up and it to be a dream or something. i'm so happy which is definatly not like me i'm used to sulking in my room all day LOL. anyway i have some news i'm engaged yep i'm gonna be a bride not for a lil while but it's so cool *sigh* nicks so cute i think he's got something planned for valintines day :)he's so sweet anywhoo talk to ya later

everything

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 02:11:20 GMT

good morrow to thee
i know its been a long time too long infact. i've missed my little internet social life. and many of you have helped me through some of the hardest times i've ever had to face. but some happy news i'm going back to tafe to do my AIN (assistant in nurseing) my new meds are working wonders i'm more involved then ever with disabled kids and i have a man. his name is nick and he makes me happy :D last night he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and well i want that too

anyway i must be off i love you all xoxoxoxoxoxox em

crap

Sat, 10 Dec 2005 13:46:22 GMT

well howdy (oh that is so lame)

i've finished TAFE. i found an unlikly friend on the bus & now we're like besties. it's weird very hard to describe we have sex but it's more then just fuck buddies. he likes this 13 yr old beccy chick & i like him a lot. but i figure this song is the best desciption of the situation

Wicked Game - HIM
The world was on fire, no-one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd need somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd need somebody like you

No I don't wanna fall in love
this world is always gonna brake your heart
No I don't wanna fall in love
this world is always gonna brake your heart
..with you

What a wicked game to play
To make me feel this way
What a wicked thing to do
To let me dream of you
What a wicked thing to say
You never felt this way
What a wicked thing you do
To make me dream of you

No I don't wanna fall in love
this world is always gonna brake your heart
No I don't wanna fall in love
this world is always gonna brake your heart
..with you

The world was on fire, no-one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
No and I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you
I'll never dream that I lose somebody like you, no

Now I wanna fall in love
This world is always gonna brake your heart
Now I wanna fall in lust
This world is always gonna brake your heart
..with you

Nobody loves no-one

catch ya

Broken

Thu, 20 Oct 2005 02:42:56 GMT

i got my P's & a car thats right i own a car it's sooooo much fun driving around listening to HIM & manson & slipknot up full ball but at the moment i'm feeling very down coz i got my heart broken last night for the LAST time might i add it's like one of the first times i've ever cried over a guy & i hate that i don't hate him fuck i'm sick of all the insensitive pricks that live in nowra grrrrr. i'm not letting myself get hurt anymore

hiya

Fri, 14 Oct 2005 04:49:54 GMT

So i'm going to the doctors pretty soon to see the test results i have no idea what to expect so i'm just gonna cross my fingers. i'm not able to post the journal i made of when i worked with disabled kids just a whole lot of red tape & *rolls eyes* but it was awesome & i'm going back at christmas. sorry about not being on much i just don't have the net at home anymore & that makes it difficult. ummm lots of other stuff not that interesting though so i'll post later.
peace out my lovlies

Hey guys

Sat, 08 Oct 2005 07:23:39 GMT

i did it i got my tounge pirced yesterday afternoon i'll post pics asap. yeasterday was also my last day of work placement where i've been working on a holiday program for disabled kids. i'm going to post the diray of my work placement on here asap. i took lots of pics but due to confidenuality laws i am unable to post them & i can't mention any names either. but anyway i miss the kids already co i fell in love with them they are so awesome. i'm going back in the christmas holidays as well. anyhoo i also put a heap of resumes out so cross fingers i'll have a job soon. i'm going for my Ps on monday & i hope for my sake i get them i'm dying with out them & when i get a job it will depend on me having them. i think thats about it. oh yeah my last test is also on monday so hopefully i'll know itn about a week if theres anything wrong with me.

peace out luv ya long time muwah

pieces of my life

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 02:53:21 GMT

Hey ppl
i haven't posted in a while so i figured i'd update in point form here tis:

# This month i got really bad period pain so i went to the doctor now i gotta have all these tests, i've already had the blood test.
# I'm getting a car in the next week as well as my p plates (it means i can drive on my own) freedom here i come
# i've been doing work experience at a vacation care place for mentally disabled kids which is awesome fun
# i'm so ahead at tafe with my assessment tasks & i'm loving not having to worry about it
# i'm learning to play aerials on the guitar
# I"M GETTING MY TOUNGE PIRECED IN LESS THEN 3 DAYS!! i'm gonna be licking everyones arms lol

Thats about it peace out <3 em

gacked from anthony

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 02:40:54 GMT

LJ Interests meme results

aniceint history:
Love it, mostly medievil altho i've always wanted to be mummified (after i die obviously)
bisexuals:
i am one & who wouldn't love me lol
black clothes:
Thats pretty much all i wear but comeon nothing goes better with black then black
blood drinking:
ahhh a more strange one. i do drink blood my own & others as a sexual thing (hey don't knock it till you try it) it stems from my fasination with vampires
dirty talking:
i'm not sure why i like it but i love being talked to dirty lol
flogging molly:
Great band mixes irish folk with heavy metal lol
him:
AWWWWWWWEEEEESSSOOOMMMEEEE band ville is the sex
sex:
come on who dosen't love it
slipknot:
OK this is one of my all time fave bands. love sid #8 & am getting slipknot s on my wrist (tattoo)
valintineo rossi:
(know i didn't spell that right) he is the best rider ever & not th mention sexy as

Enter your LJ user name, and 10 interests will be selected from your interest list.

Gacked from poeticinsomniac

Thu, 29 Sep 2005 04:22:17 GMT

<td align="center">

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

PLEASE IGNORE LAST POST IT WAS DONE BY MY FRIEND SARAH WHO WAS VERY MUCH STONED

YO

Sat, 24 Sep 2005 10:52:10 GMT

hello sweethearts......hahahaha......im drunk.....hahahahaah.....ur not...... im now gay......yes thats right......GAY......so....know i get more pussy then all of u suckers......hahahaha.... coz im a licker not a sucker.....hahahaahaha.....bye party people......love ya long time....... me is only $10.....HAHAHAHAHAHA.....KISS KISSS.... AVA

Stuff

Sat, 17 Sep 2005 01:09:29 GMT

hey sorry i haven't posted in a while i've been soooo busy with tafe. but anyway last night i went to toby's 21st (toby goes to tafe with me) it was in the function room in a pub OMG did i have a blast or what i didn't come home till 1am. i was dirty dancing with toby (he's gay but fuck he can dance) andrew (a guy i know from LFY was he drunk or what as he was leaving we said goodbye & kissed like five times) & this lesbian chick em we ended up making out. i danced for like 5 straight hours. the last thing i remember is asking a chick the time (10:40pm) then looking up to see em with her top pulled up pressing her boobs against the window LMAO. man was i wasted my rents picked me up at one. dads not really impressed but mum can see the fun side. im hungover so bad right now but totally worth it. i'm going out with em again tonight before she goes home. Anyway sarah (a chick from tafe) has been planning to go overseas & she's invited me i think i'll go. it's mainly europe. for $1900 you can pick like 5 or 6 places to go i'm going with sarah but i might split up with her at the end coz i don't really wanna go to bangkok so i might go somewhere else most likely paris or ireland (paris coz the Louvre & ireland coz i've just always wanted to go see where my family's from) the only down side to that is i don't think i'd like being alone in a strange country. TAFE is going well every thing i've handed in i've passed with flying colors. there a 2 different ways they mark each one. sometimes it's ungraded which means a pass or fail other times it's graded which is fail, pass, credit or distinction all my graded have been credit which is awesome. ummm i think thats it. peace out xoxo em

Stuff, stuff & you guessed it STUFF

Wed, 24 Aug 2005 09:09:07 GMT

hey you
whats happening? my icons hot (sorry to state the obvious). anyway i've spent the last 3 days at home dying of some viruis. on the seconed day ok well really really early on the third day at like 3am i had to go to hospitial to have blood tests & some shots i had like 5 needles jabbed into me over the coarse of 3 hours. by the time we got home the sun was just starting to come up. but today i felt much better. i clipped my dog, put a strecher in my ear & had a huge bubble bath whilst singing to system yeah gotta love it anyways gtg put the final touches on my assessment task. love ya em xoxo peace out. i leave you with

system of a down: forest

Walk with me my little child
To the forest of denial
speak with me my only mind
walk with me until the time
and make the forest turn to wine
you take the legend for a fall
you saw the product
why can't you see that you are my child
why don't you know that you are my mind
tell everyone in the world, that I'm you
take this promise to the end of you
walk with me my little friend
Take this promise to the end
Speak with me my only mind
Walk with me until the end
And make the forest turn to sand
you take the legend for a fall
you saw the product
why can't you see that you are my child
why don't you know that you are my mind
tell everyone in the world, that I'm you
take this promise to the end of you
Take this promise for a ride
you saw the forest, now come inside
You took the legend for it's fall
you saw the product of it all
no televisions in the air
no circumcisions on the chair
You made the weapons for us all
just look at us now
why can't you see that you are my child
why don't you know that you are my mind
tell everyone in the world, that I'm you
take this promise to the end of you

BLAH!!

Fri, 19 Aug 2005 06:42:51 GMT

So yeah i finally signed out of school wooo!!! words can not describe the awesomeness of finaly being free of that hell hole & all the sub humans that dewell there. i WAS going to sign out with mandy but she started crying so i went on my own i had fun though it's unlikly she'll be allowed to stay over again coz she didn't have very good manners towards my mum. a few of my other friends are like that which pisses me off coz i respect their parents. jess is always nice which i guess explains why shes always allowed over no questions asked. shrugs i gtg i've gotta do an assessment task for tafe. love you em

ok so i've been slack

Fri, 05 Aug 2005 05:45:37 GMT

since i haven't posted in a while i'm gonna give you a quick run down ask if you want any extra details:

# I droped out of school to start attending tafe which i love.
# I've been fucked around by a guy & am now offically sick of all the arseholes that seem to populate Nowra
# I've given up cutting completly for almost 2 months & i cut down smoking to about a pack of 25 a week
# My step pop's in hospitial for at least 8 weeks & he will lose his leg just above the ankle.
# I'm changing my meds from anti-depressants to mood stablisers & the diagonosis of bi-polar is still very much true (for some stupid reason i was hoping the doctor had it wrong the first time)
anyway i've got homework (reserching metal bands & metal heads yeah like thats work)so i gotta go luv ya em xoxo

Bloodline Lyrics:
Eternal the kiss I breath
Siphon your blood to me
Feel my wounds of your god
Forever rape mortality
I smell of death
I reek of hate
I will live forever
Lost child pay the dead
Bleeding screams of silence
In my veins your eternity

I'll kill you and your dreams tonight
Begin new life
Bleed your death upon me
Let your bloodline feed my youth

First breath born come alive learn to kill
Bloodfest awaits to feed your hunger
Dark side has no rival test your faith in blood
Night hides the hunting packs a feeding frenzy

I'll kill you and your dreams tonight
Begin new life
Bleed your death upon me
Let your bloodline feed my youth

I am the first not the last
Condemned by a single kiss
Betrayed eternally I'll rip inside your soul
Contaminating the world
Defying god and son
Black heart that brings your death
Living in infamy

Drink the flesh of life itself
Prepare to reign a thousand years

I'll kill you and your dreams tonight
Begin new life
Bleed your death upon me
Let your bloodline feed my youth

New LJ

Thu, 21 Jul 2005 04:55:28 GMT

Hey this is my new Live journal, formaly Confused_em *waves*